By Sharon Peterson
Children are a blessing from the Lord. They can also create a strain on our marriage relationship. While children present challenges for both moms and dads (and especially if you are a single parent), In this post I want to focus on moms since they tend to be the most affected by the demands of parenting—particularly during the early years.
This is the time of year when many moms are wondering “what can I do with my kids?” They have been in the house most of the winter and both you and them need a break. As moms, we can lose our patience and get upset easily as we have exhausted our list of things to do inside. Also we are needing time for ourselves. We have to remember that God is concerned about sparrows so He definitely is concerned about us and our situation. So how do we manage this situation?
Connect with God
The first thing I did as a young mom would be to make sure I didn’t sacrifice my time with the Father so that He would guide my busy days with my children. This didn’t always happen in the morning as we know what mornings can be like with kids. It could be in the afternoon during nap time or at night when they were in bed. I needed His perspective on how to manage my days and to make the most of them and not just go through the routine day after day with no purpose.
Connect with others
Next, I would talk with other moms in my situation and set up times to meet with them and their children. This gave me some much-needed adult conversation while my kids had fun playing with other kids. As moms, we can give—and get—support and wisdom from each other.
Get out of the house
I would also plan outings once or twice a week. Sometimes we would go to parks, the pool (3 or more times in the summer), library, zoos, museums, walks. These outings provide exercise for their bodies and stimulation for their minds. They are much more likely to take those much desired naps after these excursions.
Create time for yourself
Another thing I did was try to get out for some “me time”. I would exchange sitting time with another mom, and get out to exercise, shop, run errands or whatever I wanted to do for a small block of time in the day. This is great to do once or twice a week. It really “charges our batteries” and helps us to be better moms when we get back to our children. Even Jesus needed time away from his disciples to get recharged from His Father. Don’t feel guilty when you take this time. It will help you cope with all the challenges you face as a mom. You can’t give out what you don’t have to give.
Create time for your marriage
Many husbands when returning home from work may be greeted, not with a kiss, but with a baby held at arms length by it’s exhausted mom who can’t take it anymore and needs you to step in and take over. This is a great way for husbands to love their wives, but if all your interactions are centered around your kids, your marriage will suffer. You need to create time for yourselves as a couple. You need time together for laughter, intimacy, rest, romance, and meaningful conversation. The best thing you can do for your kids is to have a strong, healthy marriage. Your love for each other will pay dividends in your kids lives.
Remember, when you are feeling stressed as a mom, remember to connect with God first, meet with others for support, plan regular activities for your kids, make sure to get some “me time”, and continue to cultivate your relationship with your husband. As you seek God, He will direct your days and make them fruitful. God bless you in your very important calling!
Are you feeling overwhelmed? You don’t have to walk through life alone. Call someone, or better yet, get together with someone to share your struggles. Everyone needs help sometime. If you are married, make sure your husband knows your struggles. Ask for his help. Finally, surrender your burdens to Jesus. Ask for His help, because he loves you and cares for you.
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